Marriage


Marriage

Sacrament of Marriage

The Catechism of the Catholic Church states, “Marriage is a lifelong partnership of the whole of life, of mutual and exclusive fidelity, established by mutual consent between a man and a woman, and ordered towards the good of the spouses and the procreation of offspring.” (no. 1601). Marriage is a model institution of the love of God that a couple is called to in the world.  The sacredness, trust, and commitment builds a forever capacity to live out the sacrament for the rest of their lives.

Marriage Preparation


WELCOME TO THE MARRIAGE PREPARATION PROCESS
 
The day is fast approaching when you will be starting a new life together.  At St. Frances Cabrini we want to give you two gifts for your marriage.  First, we want to provide you with a lasting memory of a beautiful wedding and secondly, we want to help ensure that you have a beautiful marriage that will last a lifetime.  Providing you with these gifts can take as long as 9-12 months to complete.  Outlined below are the steps necessary to complete our Marriage Preparation Process.
 
Step One:  Congratulations!
You have completed the most important step – You have decided to get married! Please call Trudy and schedule your appointment with a priest or deacon and your tentative wedding date.  
 
Step Two:  Meet with the Priest or Deacon
At this meeting, you will complete the FOCCUS inventory, turn in your baptism certificates and pay the sanctuary fee. Also, it will be determined if you are free to marry and understand the lifelong commitment of love.  

Required Paperwork
 
Step Three:  Attend Marriage Builder Weekend
Our weekend for engaged couples is a wonderful opportunity to grow in your relationship with each other and with God. It is a very relaxed atmosphere, with time for talks and sharing. This fulfills the requirements of the Archdiocese for “God’s Plan for a Joy-filled Marriage” and life skills portion.  

Step Four: Natural Family Planning Course 
Another tool for your marriage is the completion of this three-session series that meets usually once a month. See brochure for the locations of the classes and details. Be sure to send us a copy of the Completion certificate.  You may find the classes by going to the Marriage Preparation link found on the Archdiocese of Denver web page:  Natural Family Planning Classes
 
Step Five: In-Home Sessions 
At Cabrini we give you the gift of discussing your future marriage with a loving married couple from our parish community. You will also review the FOCCUS inventory during these sessions. This sponsor couple will be contacting you prior to your wedding. 

Step Six: Wedding Ceremony Details
During this phase, you will meet with the Director of Worship Ministry, the Lead Decorator and the Rehearsal Couple.   

There are many links to help you understand the marriage preparation process for the Archdiocese of Denver and St. Frances Cabrini.  Our goal is to give you the understanding and tools necessary to live in the Sacrament of Matrimony for your entire life.  This is the biggest commitment you will make in your life and we want to see you be a model for others.

Forms

Natural Family Planning

The Office of Marriage & Family Life promotes Natural Family Planning (NFP) as a highly effective, martially enriching, spiritually enlightening, emotionally uplifting, sexually fulfilling and moral means of planning one's family.  Less that 1% of couples that practice NFP get divorced.  It is also 99% effective in helping couples postpone pregnancy.  There are two methods to explore which enhance a life of sacramental love.  It is not the Rhythm Method.

http://archden.org/eflm/nfp

Marriage Enrichment and Unity (Me&U)

We are a Christ-centered community open to all married couples and provide encouragement to couples through learning, inspiration, tools, prayer and fellowship.  Workshops and retreats are held throughout the year to help a couple strengthen their marriage and recognize the love of God reflected in their relationship. Click here for ME&U Schedule

Marriage Counseling

We have many counselors to help marriage couples get through the difficult times in their lives.  Sometimes couples just need a tune-up in their relationship.  The counselors that are recommended either see clients at St. Frances Cabrini or at a nearby location. Contact Karen Crum (303) 953-7765for the names of counselors that may help you.

Annulments

The Catholic Church teaches that a valid sacramental marriage is a permanent, lifelong commitment between a man and woman.  A decree of annulment says that, in the eyes of the Catholic Church, a sacramental marriage never existed.  You will find a further explanation and links to help you understand the process.  Unfortunately, there is a great deal of mis-communication and myths about annulments and the process.  We are here to help you through this difficult time. For more information or to start the annulment process, please contact Father Sean or Father Nathan at 303-979-7788.
Is an annulment a Catholic form of divorce? 
No. It is a declaration of nullity.
 
Someone told me I needed an annulment. What is it? 
An annulment is a declaration of the Church, after a thorough investigation, that a valid marriage never existed.

So what constitutes marriage? 
According to the Church, marriage is the intimate, exclusive, indissoluble covenant or partnership of life and love entered by man and woman at the design of the Creator for the purpose of their own good and the procreation and upbringing of children. When validly contracted between two baptized people, it is a sacrament. (CCC 1601)
 
What makes a marriage valid?
In order for marriage to be validly established, bride and groom must: 
  - Have no impediments to marriage (e.g. being married to someone else) 
  - Follow the proper form of the sacrament 
  - Have the proper capacity to exchange consent and do so freely 
    and unconditionally 
  - Consent to what the Church intends by marriage, that is:
     - fidelity,
     - indissolubility and 
     - openness to children.
 
Is this just a Catholic thing? 
No. For millennia, civilizations have held to this view of marriage. Those societies who rejected it have crumbled from within. If a society does not embrace this understanding of marriage, history tells us it will experience several hardships, one of which is divorce. Other hardships might include the unwillingness on the part of men to care for women and the children they bore, unwed mothers, fatherless children, adultery, and increase in promiscuity, breakdown of the family, increased need for social services, etc.
 
Give me an example of how someone could make an invalid consent to marriage. 
There are many elements that can invalidate the consent to marriage such as:
  - Being hampered psychologically, or offering the consent under fear or duress. 
  - Abuse or addiction of some kind that would hinder you from freely consenting.
  - Lack of knowledge of certain habits of the partner that, if known prior to 
    marriage, one of the partners would never have given consent to the marriage. 
  - Having the intent to be unfaithful.

Are my children illegitimate? 
No. Legitimacy is a legal term that refers to whether or not you know who the father is.  
In the eyes of God, there is no such thing as an illegitimate child because God is the Father of us all.

What are the steps in the annulment process?

Step 1
Complete the "Preliminary Questionnaire for Marriage Case" that you can pick up from Father Sean or Father Rick and send to the Metropolitan Tribunal with a check for $25.00 (an initial processing fee).

Step 2
Based on the answers to this questionnaire, typically two types of annulments will be pursued, either:
     A. Lack of Form process    
 or    
     B. Formal Petition
 
Lack of Form Process
This form is for Catholics who have married outside the Church without permission. They need an annulment because they did not follow the proper form of the sacrament. If you fall under this group, you must

A. Complete a second set of questions (3 pages) and

B. Return it to St. Frances Cabrini for your advocate's signature.

C. It must include an additional $25.00 and three documents:
     1. Recent updated baptismal certificate (6 mos. or less)
     2. Certified copy of your marriage certificate
     3. Certified copy of your divorce/dissolution

This process usually takes 4-8 weeks to process.
 
Formal Petition 
This form is for Catholics married in the Church, any baptized non-Catholics, or any non-baptized persons.  If you fall under this group, you must:

A.      Fill out the second set of questions (21 pages); pages 8-16 are detailed
         questions that should be answered with great detail, if possible.

B.      Return to St. Frances Cabrini for the advocate’s signature.

C.      You must include 3 documents:
           1. Recent updated baptismal certificate (6 mos. Or less).
           2. Certified copy of marriage certificate.
           3. Certified copy of divorce/dissolution.

D.      Include list of witnesses.

E.      After the petition is accepted, an initial $50 processing fee is required then a
         $450 amount (can be paid over 12 months) to complete the petition. 
This process usually takes 9 months to 1 ½ years.  This fee only partially covers the cost incurred by the Tribunal to process the annulment.  The remaining amount is paid on your behalf by either the parish or the archdiocese.

There is a remote possibility that if the parties to the marriage in question were not baptized at the time of the marriage, that marriage could be dissolved under the grounds of either the Petrine or Pauline Privilege.  If this is the case, please call Sherwood Owens for further clarification of the privileges. 

If you have any questions, please call us at 303-979-7688.
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